1) His kittens
2) Taking LSD
This guy loved to, ‘drop acid’ (is that how the kids say it?) and play with his kittens. Man, he loved those cats.
Anywho, ol’ mate decided to hang up his acid hat and join the real world, even if it meant no more rainbow unicorns sneezing golden sparkles. He wanted to be a respectable cat owner and member of society.
However, the only thing worse than withdrawing from LDS was the realisation that he didn’t actually own any kittens!!
He’d come to love them and was devo’ed they were gone (can they really be gone if they never even existed? Paradox much?).
The moral of this story?
Don’t do drugs kids. It will give you an unwarranted attachment to phantom pets.
"Did you feed the cats?"